Allowing Awkward

Recovering from hand surgery has given me great insight and perspective on our human condition.  We take so much for granted, at least I did. I never thought about the complex action required of different muscles to hold, squeeze, and turn a cap on a bottle.  Or that I’d need to put my other arm through my sleeve first as I put on my shirt because my hand didn’t flex backwards that far yet (if ever again).

All of that got me thinking about how awkward life is right now.  I’m learning to do things, the “normal” things of daily life. I’m doing them differently.  This is giving me further fodder for my October retreat where we’ll not only focus on personal breakthrough plans, but also on creative thought processes.  (see www.StuckAtTheTop.com for more)

When was the last time you stepped into something as a truly awkward beginner?  Your mind tells you that you “should” know what to do. Your body tells you that another path is required.  And so, you learn anew.  

Allowing For Awkward is the theme of this week’s Wednesdays With Wayne.  

When the surgery first happened, I had an excuse for feeling bad or “off.”  My wrist was opened, and a bone was removed while other bones were fused together.  That’s something, really. My fingers turned zombie blue/green/black as a part of the recovery process.  I was on opioids and my arm was in a sling.

Now, I’m in this beautiful personal-molded black plastic slotted spoon of a splint.  I’m off of all medication. And I’m testing my limits more than I should. I don’t like awkward.  I don’t like not doing.  

And my body says, “so what?”  

It IS awkward.  You can’t do everything the way you used to.  So get over it and learn new ways.

And so, I’m learning new ways.

I’m learning new ways of sleeping, eating, and bathing.  You know the hardest part? I’m learning new ways of having fun.  My wife points out that I have a little vanity thing going on. Okay, I can admit to not loving the oh-so-fashionable compression glove I had to wear under this slotted-spoon of a splint.  So I didn’t allow myself to be fully expressed.

It was that realization that led me to this writing.  I’m a high performer, founder of The DynamicLeader® programs, and I’m not allowing myself to be fully expressed?  What’s wrong with me? I felt damaged. I felt altered. I didn’t feel like “me,” so I didn’t know what a full expression of “me” would be.

And that’s where we all need to Allow For Awkward just that bit more.  We can each let others see that bit of us we thought wasn’t perfect. I actually CAN have fun.  I actually CAN let people see this thing. And if they judge me because of it, that’s on them.

So I’m learning to take on what I thought I knew.  I’m experiencing the world in new ways. It IS awkward.  I’m letting go of judgement about the compression glove and the splint.  And I’m letting my body guide the way for what more it needs.

You know what it needs most?  My acceptance.

And it needs to be more fully expressed in the world, in the board room, in the media, and at home.  

Whether you’re recovering from something or not, you need the same:

Acceptance and greater self-expression.

Go.

Get Awkward.

Learn something new.  Explore. Experience.

And… enjoy!

See you here next week.

Keep making your magic!

~ Dr P ~