Your life is pretty okay. You know it could be better. And the truth is,  you don’t have to change anything. There is another truth: you could choose to change something and go after what you really want. 

Like it or not, you probably are like most people. That’s not a bad thing (and even if it were, there’s no judgment here). Here’s an odd thing – most people have wishes BUT (and I so seldom use that word) they actually don’t know what they really want. They can’t put it into words.

Two quick truths:

• Most people don’t know what they want
• Most people have a bias toward what they already know

The bias toward the known keeps you comfortably uncomfortable. You know what you know. It’s a predictable loop for you as you work toward the weekend or that vacation or retirement. And that’s truly okay IF you are truly okay with it. What I know from my own life and the clients that work with me is that...

Back in June, I wrote about a Wayne-ism about Keep Making Your Magic. That got some great feedback. It also got a response I didn’t expect when a friend of mine whom I hadn’t heard from in a while wrote to me with a serious question: What if you can no longer find your magic?

Sometimes you - people in general, not just you personally - get tired. Sometimes you get into the routine of giving until you don't have anything left to give. And then you look at your life and wonder where you're heading. You might even wonder how much is left. And at the very worst, you wonder if any of it is or was worth it.

Please, if you feel like you’re off purpose or lost your magic, there are a few things at play. 

You got into a routine of “doing the right thing” for everyone else and you forgot what it is that you truly desire. If you've leaned into all of the “supposed-to” stuff, then you let yourself get trapped into believing that...

When a tooth breaks, there are a few, very few options. Last week, we looked at how awareness leads to choice. When there’s an emergency, you don’t feel like you have ANY choice. The thing to remember is that there is always, always a choice.

Each choice leads to its own series of consequences and that leads to more awareness which, in turn, leads to greater choice.  After a decade of conservative treatment, I required oral surgery.

And with that, I had new awareness. 

I won’t be graphic here, just know that oral surgery is surgery. It’s surgery, in your mouth. For me, I was sore. There were tissue things I had to care for, but not in the same was as if you’d scraped your knee or something. And I was on a medication regimen.

Awareness of discomfort.

Awareness of a new spot in my mouth I apparently needed to keep exploring.

Awareness of where I could and couldn’t/shouldn’t put pressure.

Every meal...

Spiraling Towards Freedom is the name of the last chapter in my very first book, Choosing Your Power. In that chapter, I describe a process of circular philosophy. The short version is that you have to put yourself in a place of understanding so that you can know. And in that special chapter of Choosing Your Power, I introduce the concept that Awareness Leads To Choice. 

You have to understand so that you can know. You have to know so that you can understand.

And you the more aware you become, the more choices you have. The more choices you have, the more aware you become. 

Analogy: Let’s say you go to an Italian restaurant. You love lasagna and you’ve heard that it’s an Italian specialty. You could be given a menu and choose not to look at it, “Do you have lasagna? I’d like that, please” you order politely.  

Two things are at play here:

First, if that’s really, really what you want, then...

What is the mistake that leaders make that results in a pretty bad crash and burn?  They either fail their teams, their families, or themselves by ignoring one simple truth with two deliberate paths. 

Hint: You MUST do both!

You’re here because you are playing to win and not just playing not-to-lose. That’s another concept for another day and we’ll dive in deep on that later. For now, you’ve got to know that if you came over to my place and asked for orange juice, I couldn’t give you any.

Why? Because I don’t have any to give. And that’s a funny thing because, I know where to get it. So, let’s play out this analogy.

Your special person, your team members, your community – they’re each in need of something from you. What if you’ve been giving and going and giving, and going, and you just don’t have any “juice” left to give. You’re exhausted. And yet, you...

I just had a high-performing entrepreneur ask me if there were any tips I could offer to help him get things done along a timeline rather than wait till the last minute. “How can I create artificial pressure that I seem to respond to for a real looming deadline?”

He’s worried about being a procrastinator even though when he’s against the deadline, everything is produced on time.

You either are like this or you know someone like this. So, this blog’s for you!

Here ya go – 

You’re not doing nothing. 

That double negative is to say, you ARE doing something, even if it’s not fully expressed outwardly. Give yourself the gift of lightening up. Personally, I always failed the part of school assignments that required me to turn in an outline. Yes, I have five books out there and two more in the mix. And yes, each book is divided into chapters (like an outline). And NO, I didn’t start there. I started...

Last week we looked at three qualities for a great company and for your life.

Today, let’s look at three key questions to ask to leverage into a life you’ll love. Here we go!

Three key questions to leverage into the life you’ll love:

1. What is the feeling you want to have in your life every day? (e.g. I want to wake up feeling grateful and loving. I want to know I’m crushing it. I want to feel _____.)
2. What needs to happen for you to feel that way?
   Surprisingly, it’s just a decision to do so. When you make a decision, you create the circumstances and connections to make that feeling a reality. You choose to change your perspective and then the world changes for you!
   
3. What do you need to get rid of, to clear out psychologically or physically, to make the path more readily accessible?

Most people that I’ve worked with, from those who are just starting out all the way to my VIP high level performers - executives and business owners – have...

The people in your life, they’re great company. Right?

The organizations you affiliate with, they’re great company. Right?

Whether you work with or for an organization. There are three top qualities that make it great. And it just so happens that these three qualities make anyone you hang around great.

Here they are:

1. Purpose – it’s clear what the person or organization stands for and is aiming toward. We love people and organizations with purpose. We feel like we can stand behind them and support their values because there is a values-match.
2. Recognition – Great people and great cultures within organizations find ways to acknowledge others, especially where actions are aligned with values. “You did xyz and that is so aligned with my personal/the company’s values. Thank you!” It’s simple. It’s rare.
3. Culture – There is one. There’s a “vibe” about a person and there’s a clear...

You’ll hear me talk about Exponential Success and it may be a concept that just blows past you. I’m not talking about becoming successful. I’m talking about taking your path from fine to absolutely amazing. I’m talking about going from room temp to boiling.

Room temperature – everything is fine. My life is fine. I’m, uh… living the dream (which means I’m lying about being fine).

Warm – you know, I’ve made some decisions and chosen a path that’s pretty good. I feel good. I have some of the things I want for my life. I really don’t need those other things.

Remember that I’ll encourage you to get really clear about what you desire. That’s where you make your life truly magical. And when you hear the voice in your head telling you that you don’t need that thing you’re interested in, pay attention to who’s voice that is. The voice of shame or guilt is likely from your...

Sometimes a profound quote from a mentor sticks with you. From my clinical psychology grad-school days (dang, 45 years ago) comes this gem: 

Accidents Are The Choreography of Ambivalence

How great is that! If you think about the times you’ve hesitated instead of being clearly decisive, you’ll see that there were a lot of opportunities for things to go badly. And if you reflect on the accidents in your life, you’ll see that someone involved made a decision up the line that wasn’t based on real clarity.

It’s this simple – we say we’re “confused” when we’re not clear about our desired outcome. Maybe guilt or shame stops us from pursuing what we really, truly desire. So our vision of what we want is obfuscated. We demonstrate our ambivalence in various ways. An “accident” happens. And then of course, we can’t be, do, or have what we want because of the “accident.”

...